Leaving the house is always a battle, but stepping outside in full alt drip, completely solo (well, excluding the rest of the system backchanneling in my head) is a whole different level of stress. The mission was basic: go grab a sick glow-in-the-dark hoodie we snagged on Vinted from the parcel locker. I had All Time Low blasting way too loud, my giant hood hiding the headset, and for about five minutes, I felt like the main character in a music video. Then the whole trip turned into a complete disaster.
First, my phone decided to ditch my hoodie pocket. If three random people hadn't chased me down to give it back, I would've been cooked - though my brain dissociated so fast that the rest of the system dipped, leaving me with a simple "oh f*ck." Right after that, I glitched at a crosswalk for five straight minutes because I straight-up forgot how traffic lights work. At the parcel locker, it got even worse: I was using a friend's code and almost accidentally robbed someone else who happened to open their locker remotely at the exact same second.
To top off the social cringe, on my way back, someone stepped toward me just to compliment my fit. My social anxiety went straight to the moon - I gasped, jumped back, made a terrified face, and almost bolted down the street. The poor guy probably thought I was an absolute a**hole. And the final boss? Reinstalling TikTok after a 3-hour hyperfocused recording session to Escape the Fate, completely wiping 20 music video drafts into the abyss.
A year ago, a cascade of fails like this would've mentally destroyed me. Today, I'm just sitting here like, "well f*ck it, it happened." The first solo trip set the bar embarrassingly high, but hey - at least the hoodie actually glows in the dark.
Stay scene, stay weird... and fr, watch out for fake hoodie pockets! 🖤📱
